4/14/08

Friendly Skies

That's what the ads exhorted us to enjoy. Turns out friendliness is a big problem. The FAA apparently has been a bit too cozy, warm and fuzzy with some airlines. No big deal, right? Except they were ignoring a lot of things that should have been fixed. Doesn't it give you a feeling of security to know the plane you're about to board was checked over by some good friends of the airline?

"I don't know Jim, that wing looks a bit loose."

"Uh huh, it does kinda. Next!"

Can you say things got a bit FAA***ed up? And things like this keep happening. I don't know about you, but whenever I hear some federal agency or other has been given the task of making sure anything we ride in, fly in, sail in, or skate on meets all safety standards, that's when I want to start investing in medical equipment companies, hospitals and mortuaries. Come on folks, these are the same guys who came up with the fence between us and Mexico and the income tax and social security and our immigration policy and the drug war. I say starting right now,each and every person should be issued tool kits and safety manuals at birth. We need to start taking responsibility for our own safety instead of leaving it to the government; they've got more than enough to do already, and you see what happens when they try to multitask. Trust me, the herd will still get thinned, but it'll be our own damned fault. There's a reason it's called "natural selection".

I'm not real comfortable with friends checking their friends' work. Find me a company in the world whose employee handbook says, ".....before you finish any project, be sure and let Uncle Bob give it the seal of approval." Not a good idea in the corporate world, not a good idea in the government sector. "Uncle Bob" is most likely gonna rubberstamp your plan to display the shirts where the dresses are now and vice versa at your department store. But the FAA and "Uncle Bob" are approving errors in big tubes of metal weighing thousands of tons that will drop like stones when stuff goes wrong. And take lots of folks with them. I wonder how many FAA chiefs flew on their good buddies' planes? Think this could be a big reason the terrorists haven't done anything here since 9/11? They probably just figure they'll sit back and watch us do ourselves in.

"Damn Jim, I can't hardly believe that exit door just fell off in flight. You sure nobody I know was on that plane? I'd hate to think that. A stranger is one thing, but a friend...."

Copyright ©  2008 thehumorsmithchronicle

0 comments: