
MANITOWOC, Wis. -A 36-year-old man took revenge on his roommate after she refused to have sex with him by allegedly urinating on her dog, police said. Police said the man was arrested early Thursday morning on tentative charges of criminal damage to property and disorderly conduct related to domestic violence.
According to police reports, the man was drunk when he argued with the woman. After she resisted his advances the man went to the basement where he urinated on her dog and the floor.
Whatever happened to making the woman walk home if she turned you down, or putting runs in all her stockings, or stealing her cell phone? Maybe it's just me, but this seems a tad extreme.
"You don't wanna sleep with me, so I'll urinate on your dog."
Of course, it's probably expecting too much for a guy to just calmly accept the fact he's not wanted and gracefully exit. No wonder so many women are turning lesbian. Can you blame them? When's the last time you heard about a woman peeing on a guy's dog because he wouldn't sleep with her? Matter of fact, when's the last time you heard about a guy refusing to have sex with a woman?
I thought so...most likely you can count the times on one finger. Men have a tendency to act out when they don't get their way, and this is just another example.Anyone wanna bet Bush orchestrated the financial black hole because the Dems kept blocking his every move? I don't know about you, but I'd've been happier if he'd just peed on my cat.
Did this guy actually think going number one on her pooch would make her change her mind? What kind of thought process is that? Who decides to urinate on a dog because he can't have sex? Maybe I'm dense, but I don't get the connection.
"I said no, and I meant it. I just don't like you in that way. Oh my God, what the hell are you doing to Fluffy? I can't believe it...what do you think she is, a urinal? Oh, that's just...wait....I..I must have you now! Come here you big stud. No, that's okay, you can just leave it out."
Yeah, right. How about cooking her dinner and cleaning the house? Where did he get the idea a Golden Retriever shower was foreplay? If I were him, I'd watch out this Halloween, and not let the roomie pick his outfit, even if dressing as a fire hydrant is a sure "best original costume" contest winner.


Copyright © 2008 thehumorsmithchronicle





6 comments:
LOL! I think peeing on your roomate's dog is perfectly appropriate these days!
I went the other way. I had my dog pee on her...
I would have to say...I think she made the right choice. Maybe she wasn't into "Golden Showers"?
LMAO @ Golden retriever shower.
You know there is a doggy style joke in this story somewhere.
You should turn this into a screenplay, it would win at the Indy Film Festival for sure.
LOL I'm gonna have an image stuck in my head all day...and it ain't a pretty one...gee thanks...but it's worth it for the laughs!
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