A view of my complex, which overlooks a lovely cement bag storage lot.Wow.....as an experience, let me heartily recommend against moving. Anywhere, for any reason. I don't care if you get a promotion, or a divorce, or your best friend offered you free lodging, do not move. Stay where you are.
Unless of course, you don't mind having your car filled with all the stuff you neglected to pack. Why all the bitter you ask? I moved. I really did, and not in a good way. The place I chose has a central Valley of the Sun location. It has walls, a roof, carpeting, a floor, and a balcony. Unfortunately that is all it has in common with the model they showed me on my first vsit.
That place was pristine. My apartment has no running water in the kitchen, no washer and dryer, beat to hell baseboards, only one tap in working order in the bathroom and...oh God, I cannot go on. Oh wait, yes I can. The couple below me apparently have insomnia and TV addiction. Their set plays loudly all night, and when I finally manage to fall asleep, I wake up 7 hours later to the sound of their TV. So naturally I do what any rational adult would do. I jump up and down on the bedroom floor, making the place shake. So there.
The place also has a unique approach to site security: the gate stays open 24/7. What a concept. What crook in the world would guess that such a clever ploy was being used to sucker them onto the premises where they can steal cars at will? Brilliant!
I was completely surprised by the bait and switch scheme, though. Silly me...I expected the model to look just like all the units, which is a bit like expecting a Playboy centerfold to be representative of all womankind. I have got to stop drinking right before appointments of any sort, job related or otherwise. Although a bit of alcohol might actually make my place look better. It works with women.
I still have most of my toys in boxes strewn about the apartment, a fact which makes walking about a bit dodgy, but I have become quite adept at hopping, jumping, and not tripping. At least I am on the top floor, so I will not be troubled by heavy footsteps from above. Too bad for my downstairs neighbors. Thanks to all that's happened, I have suffered a huge betrayal of trust and am now undergoing therapy because I've developed an apartment complex.
Copyright © 2008 thehumorsmithchronicle
7 comments:
OMG, you poor thing. Is there anyway to get out of the lease and move somewhere else? Thankfully, I've only had to live in an apartment one time. I absolutely hated it -- the neighbors I had would play basketball in the house. Wtf? Thump, thump, thump, thump.
I really do hope things work out for you! :)
:o(
But! "developed an apartment complex" brilliant!
I have moved more times than I can count, Kelly. I've lived in shitholes,ratholes and then holes so pray your next move will be better.
None of that sounds like much fun. I am hereby officially grateful I have no neighbors nearby! Look at it this way though....if you need to patch a sidewalk...you won't have to walk far!
So, you don't expect Welcome Wagon to be stopping by soon?
Look at this way (tilts head to side): moving builds character. Hey, I was trying to find something positive. That's the best I could do.
Am I too late fer the 'partment warmin' party? I say you did the right thang, Darlin'!
Eve
Yay! You moved! Boo! The new place sucks!
But.. at least you have new material now for you blog. Surely that has to be motivational. Er.. yeah, trying to look on the bright side for ya, Mr. Smith. :)
PS. Miss you in chat!
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