Friday, December 14, 2012
In all seriousness.
I think I've figured out why I've yet to produce a book. I am funny in short bursts. Just like when I make love.
So any book you see or not will likely be a collection of essays. Very short essays. With a view toward making you laugh, smile and pay me $19.99.
A guy's gotta start somewhere. The real challenge is figuring out what I'm gonna buy with that twenty bucks. These things take considerable thought, unlike my essays. Having been proved quite talented at making an ass of myself I considered writing a book of assays, but that might be a tough sell.
I might even tell the story of how I didn't ever get into making the funny for a living. It really just became an extra added attraction at my various jobs. Some places it worked better than others. Worked fine in radio. Not so much in retail, though when you think about it, retail is one of the funniest industries in the business.
Wait...retail is a business, right? Then, um....it's one of the funniest businesses in the industry. Industrial comedy is not as easy as it looks. When I was lots younger, I could fall down anytime I wanted and be just fine and get lots of laughs. Now I'm pretty sure falling down and getting back up will be an all-day experience. Still funny but not very productive, and that's one thing you can bet will not endear me to a manager's heart. It's true; I've heard rumors many managers have a heart. It's Grinch size, but in lots of cases it's there. The nice thing is they never let it interfere with business.
It's taken some time, but I know in my heart I am not suited for the business world in any way shape or Maidenform. I say Maidenform because I'm looking for a way to support myself.
No laugh? Lighten up, bra. Seriously.
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